Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him “Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!” The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.
A big thanks to my Joy for sharing this with me:
“Anchored in Love through the Storms of Life”: an interview with Bethany Hamilton (23 mins). I love Bethany’s life story which was re-ecacted in the excellent movie “Soul Surfer”.
Psalm 73:26 (NLT)
26 My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak,
but God remains the strength of my heart;
he is mine forever.
Psalm 73:26 (NKJV)
26 My flesh and my heart fail;
But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
When my skin sags and my bones get brittle,
God is rock-firm and faithful.
Psalm 63:1-4 (NLT)
1 O God, you are my God;
I earnestly search for you.
My soul thirsts for you;
my whole body longs for you
in this parched and weary land
where there is no water.
2 I have seen you in your sanctuary
and gazed upon your power and glory.
3 Your unfailing love is better than life itself;
how I praise you!
4 I will praise you as long as I live,
lifting up my hands to you in prayer.
Today as far as I know is Day #1 of a new chemo. First I’ll have an appointment with my oncologist later this morning, then the plans as of now are for me to get Abraxane instead of Taxol. I looked it up. My knee jerk response each time I research these oncology drugs is “YIKES” and “”Please help me, God”. The terrible bad things that could potentially happen directly because of the drugs themselves (but may or may not) is daunting to say the least. Abraxane is listed as a drug for different kinds of cancer: lung, pancreatic, and metastitic breast cancer. I do not have metastatic breast cancer, as in it has not spread to other organs to the best of our knowledge gleaned from a bunch of tests. This go-round is considered a second primary cancer but because I had allergic reactions to Taxol we are making the switch-a-roo to a “cousin” of Taxol that hopefully my body will tolerate much, much better.
Please pray that I will be brave. This is scarey stuff. I am asking God to give me all the courage and grace that I need and to live my life in HIS strength which I know to be more than sufficient. I wish I was not going through this great. big mess and making decisions like trading one toxic drug for another but I am counting on the truth of Romans 8:28, that God works ALL THINGS together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. My heart’s desire is for the rest of the treatment to be extraordinarily effective and well tolerated, hopefully with minimal to no side effects if such a thing is possible and that the cancer will be gone for good. It would be lovely if I could have all smooth-sailing, uneventful chemo and Herceptin infusions from now on without the nurses and oncologist needing to rush to my side again with IV push drugs, etc. My times are in His Hands and that’s a good place to be no matter the outcome or what He allows or does not allow. I am asking God to help me keep my eyes on Him, train me to grab a hold of His Hand and not let go, and to flood my heart with peace and full trust in Him, no matter what.
So very glad to be His beloved daughter,