But head knowledge isn’t enough. Hence the surgery. Hence the walking it out. The testing.
You know faith isn’t stagnant. You are either walking forward, standing still, or falling backward.
I want to move forward. And so my heart needs to align with my head. The Truths that I know, as I live them out.
There is a quote in the movie Shawshank Redemption that says, “You either get busy living, or you get busy dying.”
I want to be busy living.”
Knowing the trouble I had finding the way, I asked her if I could lead her back to her mom. Together we quietly walked the steps leading to the elevator and up to the second floor. As we walked I pointed out the landmarks so that on her way back, she would know she was going in the right direction. The signs pointing the way were hard to notice. You really had to walk with your eyes open, looking for signs marking the way. But they were there.
We said good-bye and once again the steps retraced. Only this time, my mind went to the beautiful picture it was of our walk with God. Of trusting that He will lead us to the end location. His ending. He gives us the landmarks. He gives us His Word to direct us. He gives us access to the throne of God to talk to the Father. He sets up the signposts and is the lamp. If only we would walk with eyes open to Him. The road is often uncertain. The path winding. But He will lead, if we will follow.
I got in my car to travel home with a peace in my heart.
The air outside was still tinged with the warmth of the day. The thermometer had inched into the 70’s, temperatures uncharacteristic for February in the northeast.
I glided the window down as I pulled out onto the road. I turned the volume dial on the radio and the CD from earlier flooded my ears, penetrating my heart.
I was ready to receive.
And this song came forth…..Mercy Me’s “Word of God Speak”
Finding Myself
at a loss for words
and the funny thing is, it’s ok
The last thing I need
is to be heard
but to hear
what YOU would say
Word of God speak
Would you pour down like rain
washing my eyes to see, your Majesty
to be still and KNOW
You’re in this place
Please let me stay and rest in your Holiness
Word of God speak
Finding Myself
in the midst of YOU
beyond the music, beyond the noise
All that I need
is to be with YOU
and in the quiet
hear YOUR voice
Word of God Speak…..
Finding myself
at a loss for words
and the funny thing is, it’s ok
I hit repeat and turned it up louder as I sang those words from the very core of my heart. Hearing this song long before. Knowing the words, well. But tonight a whole new meaning. They were words that I said in Truth. Not just lyrics. But my lyrics. The song of my heart sung to the heart of my God.
And the tears fell unabandoned, surrendered to Him alone.
Please, Lord, speak.
Give me a Word.
Show me You are in this place with me.
I have no words.
I am desperate to hear from you.
I am listening.”
(From James 1:7) One Thousand Gifts http://www.aholyexperience.com/
Praise God, He is keeping you encouraged!!!
Love,
Nancy Louise
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Praise God,
It is almost over and you are in the homestretch. Not much more to it. Hopefully not many side effects any more. Then on to whatever God and your Onc. have in store for you for your followup. Hoping it is easier than what has gone on so far.
A book that I am rereading is the memoirs of Sister Faustina, Divine Mercy in my Soul. It is a long book but can be read in intervals. I always find something new in it about God’s great mercy and how He wants us to depend on His Mercy.
I also have read Hind’s Feet on High Places, but it has been awhile. Perhaps I should get it out and dust it off or if I have given it away, get another copy.
My memory is not as good as I would like it to be, but I do not know whether some is cheomo brain or whether I was getting Chemo Brain from all the other medicines I am taking. Oh well. One day at a time.
I have a bit of exciting news. We had five puppies born to a sheltie mix yesterday (9/11) 4 girls and 1 boy. One of them is not thriving and has a very weak suckle reflex, so we are hand feeding her. At least we know she is getting something. She also has trouble recognizing a teet and does not know how to latch on. Hopefully our intervention will help this adorable little one and she will be able to grow up strong and healthy.
Many blessings to you Paula and to all who read this. Kathy G.
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